Behaviors Are Symptoms – Understanding Borderline Personality
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I am wary of describing any group of symptoms as a "disorder". People are more than their behaviors...
According to the National Institutes of Health (NIH), Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is “marked by an ongoing pattern of varying moods, self-image, and behavior” that can result in problematic conduct and relationships. Individuals with BPD can experience intense mood swings and significant impulsivity – often engaging in self harm and other risk-taking behaviors as they oscillate between rage and adoration…
Personally, I am wary of describing any group of symptoms as a “disorder”. Rather, I view the pattern behaviors associated with BPD as expressions of pain and as evidence of extraordinary efforts to self-soothe in the face of fear and hopelessness.
The authority, Dr. Marsha Linehan, has likened BPD to third degree burns of the “emotional skin”. In my own work, I’m struck time and again by three themes that emerge from suffering clients:
- Existential Emptiness
- Impaired Sense of Self
- Feeling Unlovable
I believe that all three can lead to shame and the fear of abandonment, further eroding self-esteem and triggering behaviors that threaten to undermine relationships. It can feel hopeless; studies have shown that 70% of the millions of people with BPD (an estimated 1.5% of all adults) make at least one suicide attempt.
Fortunately, as with other mental health disorders (including Post-Traumatic Stress which often co-occurs with BPD), there is help. Psychotherapy is associated with symptom relief and improved outcomes, both as stand-alone treatment and in conjunction with prescription medicine. Talk Therapy helps individuals heal and grow through the development of insight and trust.
In my private psychotherapy practice, I collaborate with clients – with and without BPD, and their loved ones – as we all come to understand that people are always more than just their symptoms and behaviors. With compassion for self and others, we identify and navigate the emptiness and shame, empowering clients’ self-worth and self-love in ways that can lead to permanent change.
If you or someone you love struggles with symptoms of BPD, please reach out for help.